Saturday, May 7, 2011

Dumbass of the Week

A gentleman in Illinois was arrested recently for keeping an alligator in his home.  He apparently felt it attracted females.

I'd like to poll my lady readers out there.  Given the choice between two men, who would you choose:

  1. A stable, hard working, clean guy with a job.  His house is clean, and he has a beagle or a cat
  2. A creepy loser who wants you to come over to his house to "see the alligator".  His house smells like the reptile house at the zoo, and his fish tank has a bloody alligator in it
Something tells me that any woman who gets turned on by viewing a 4 foot carnivorous reptile is one I wouldn't want knowing where I live in the first place.  Having her over might cause me to go to DEFCON 1 while I was on the lookout for Guido the Killer Meth Dealer to show up and claim her as his own.  But hey, that's just me.  Far be it for me to judge another.  There's somebody for everybody.

Add to this that the moron was basically starving the walking golf bag so that it wouldn't get any bigger, and he scores high on the DaddyBear Stupid-Is-As-Stupid-Does Scale.  

My only real question is what is the ASPCA going to do with said alligator?   My guess is either etouffee or zoo, whichever comes first.

1 comment:

Christina RN LMT said...

I'd definitely go with the former gentleman, not the creepy gator guy. Ew.

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