Something for the smoker

Workers at a wastewater plant in California have reported that a capybera was seen swimming in a pond.  Capyberas are a large rodent normally found in South America, so this is probably somebody's pet that got loose somehow.  Reports are that a capybera, hopefully the same animal, has been seen in the area several times over the past few years.

Let's assume that this isn't the same critter being seen in different places, and there is an invasive population of Rodents Of Unusual Size in southern California.  My questions are: 

• What caliber for capybera?  .22 LR or .223?
• What method for cooking capybera?  
• Do you slow roast in hickory smoke, or do a braise in the crockpot with potatoes and carrots? 
• Is thin sliced roast capybera good on ciabatta bread with swiss cheese and crisp lettuce with a honey mustard dipping sauce?
• Do you serve roast capybera with red or white wine, or is this a good dish to serve with beer?
• Can you make capybera bacon?