Thursday, July 7, 2011

Dear Father

It's been 25 years this month since I last saw you.  You and my mother had been apart for three years, and that was the first time you spent any time with us.  My brothers and sisters and I spent a weekend at Grandma's, and you came over for one afternoon.  You gave us some money and sent us to the arcade so you could visit with your mother.  Since then there hasn't been a peep.

In all that time, I've grown up, had children, travelled the world, and become a better man than you could ever hope to be.  My children never wonder if they're loved, and they never feel forgotten or unwanted.  They have never had to worry about where they will sleep, or where the next meal will come from.  They have never had to line up for a spanking when I come home from work, and they have never heard "I know you did something to deserve this." come from my lips.  Even though I was a complete moron when it came to marriage as a young man, I never took it out on them.  They always knew that they came first in all things.

My children know you exist, but will never meet you.  You will never be Grandpa to them.  Other, better men have lined up to do that.  You will never take them fishing or hunting.  They will never wake up in your home for Christmas.  You have become and will forever remain just a name on our family tree.

So I hope you enjoy your birthday next month, father.  I also hope you have many more without me and my children.

The Family, 1977

6 comments:

PISSED said...

..I wanted to let you know I read that a couple times it brings sadness but in turn it sounds like it made you a better stronger person.

Weer'd Beard said...

Sad tale, but good that you know that poison is best left alone.

You certainly have made the best of everything you had and have become a great man.

Jay G said...

Sometimes I think that things like this happen so that we can be better fathers to our children - like a reverse "lead by example" sort of thing.

You know, "What would my father have done in this case" and then do the opposite...

You're a good man in spite of your father's shortcomings, and your kids are better for it.

Old NFO said...

I'm sorry for what you've been through DB... And you ARE a good man!

Julie said...

not sure what to say to this one DB ... all i know is that you're a great guy and you're doing right by your kids!

DaddyBear said...

Thanks guys. I appreciate the thoughts.

I told you some of my posts under pain meds would be a bit off.

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