Friday, October 28, 2011

An Open Letter

To all producers, traffickers, and users of methamphetamine,

I've been feeling a bit crummy these past few days.  The medicines I have around the house just haven't been cutting it, and Irish Woman is growing tired of listening to me cough through the night.  On the way home with Boo tonight, I decided to visit my local pharmacy to get something to help the situation.  I looked through the shelves of 'alternatives' to pseudoephedrine, and eventually found the card for the medicine I wanted.  Like a good sheep, I took one of them, grabbed some cough drops, and headed over to the pharmacists service window.

After presenting the young man behind the counter with the card, my driver's license, birth certificate (not Hawaiian), blood and hair sample, fingerprint, and retinal eye scan, I then signed a pledge to not turn my cold medicine into your intoxicant of choice, paid for my purchase, and headed out of the store.  I noticed that the item I bought was on sale, and would have stocked up for the upcoming cold and flu season, but didn't because I didn't know if doing so was going to bring black clad men with guns to my door at inopportune times.

Basically, what should have been a 30 second transaction turned into a 10 minute exercise in "spot the methhead" for the pharmacist and an exercise in being suspected of being a criminal for me.

So to all of you tweaking bastards out there, let me say this:

If I ever get my hands on any of you snivelling pieces of dirt, I am going to lock you in a running cement mixer filled with thumb tacks and rubbing alcohol.  Then I'm going to smother you to death in a bag full of my used tissues and throw your body in the septic tank of the local chili restaurant.  I would consider feeding your worthless carcass to some pigs, but I have too much respect for the swine and their sty to do that.

I've been using pseudoephedrine responsibly as a cold medicine since I was a teenager, and you all have ruined that for me.  Now, I have to be treated like a suspect in order to not have a runny nose and a nagging cough. I hope you're happy, you worthless, in-bred, bucktoothed wastes of good gametes.  I hope that your lives and deaths are nasty, brutish, and protracted.  I hope that as you die, the last thing your hear in this world is the sound of your mother coughing and sneezing because you had to get high and she can't get good medicine over the counter anymore.

Respectfully and congestedly yours,

DaddyBear

9 comments:

Siddhartha said...

In Oregon we need a prescription, I have to drive an hour or so to Washington if I have a runny nose and still they still have to make me jump through the hoops that you mentioned.

Old NFO said...

Agreed!

PISSED said...

I hope I never cross you when youre sick ;)

Hope you feel better DB :)

Joat said...

I'm not pissed at the producers, traffickers, and users of methamphetamine. I'm pissed at the damn prohibitionist politicians.

Me not you said...

+1 Daddybear!

Anonymous said...

You're mad at the wrong people.

The people to hate are the ones who made it literally illegal for me to own enough cold medicine to last three days when everyone in my (admittedly large) family is sick, or to buy it at the little grocery store five minutes from my house. That we live more than 30 minutes from the nearest pharmacy might be my own fault, but the stupid laws are the fault of stupid people who think there's a way to keep adult human beings from ruining their lives if they want to.

DaddyBear said...

You guys are right. If the government wasn't so worked up about how people are getting high, then we wouldn't be going though this. But I'm also pissed at the fools who put poison in their systems. On several occasions before the new rules about cold medicine that actually works, all of the pharmacies in my area were sold out when I needed to buy some because they had been bought up by meth labs.

Anonymous said...

OK - so get yourself both a methhead and a congress critter. Truss them up cheek by jowl and throw 'em both in the cement mixer with tacks and alcohol.

It's a win-win!

Weer'd Beard said...

+1 to Anon 9:39

Meth heds are shifty tweaky parasites who steal and destroy things for their selfish wants to be cranked on meth.

That being said, there are still meth houses, there are still meth heads. There are drug dealers selling the stuff and there are people putting their neighborhood in danger cooking the stuff in makeshift "Labs".

The Decongestant laws are like the TSA, a huge violation of freedom for ZERO gain.

A better thing would be just to leave the Meth Heads alone, that crystal does FAR more damage than even Daddy Bear's ham-sized fists.

And remember that if our offspring or relatives, or friends get hooked on that horrible shit we get them treatment and get them clean...and beat them if that's what's needed.

Keep your own yard clean, and keep the government out of it...that's the ONLY solution to such problems.

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