Monday, November 28, 2011

Okey Dokey

The Pakistani Prime Minister has expressed the opinion that after the accidental bombing of Pakistani border post by NATO forces that Pakistan should require a more equal, read expensive, footing with the United States.  He feels that the United States does not respect Pakistan.  Imagine that, he believes that we don't respect a country that harbored the architect of the mass murder of our civilians, regularly supports the Taliban, has spread nuclear weapons knowledge and technology to North Korea and Iran, and has soaked us for billions in money over the past decade.

My interpretation:  We are unhappy because you shot up a border post that we were letting bad guys use to shoot at you, so we want more money or we'll keep the beans and bullets sitting at the border crossing until the tires rot, you pay up, or the entire load is stolen.

My response:  Go for it.  Shut down those supply routes and continue to support the guys who are killing civilians along with our soldiers.  We'll just shut down the money pipeline (bribe is such a harsh word, isn't it.  So is blood money) and y'all can go piss up a rope.  Hey, just to show that we're good guys, we'll go through the files of the Defense Department and the CIA and publicize all of the messed-up things y'all have done for the past 50 years that you really don't want your "masses" knowing about.  We'll, of course, sanitize the documents and indemnify our own people who took part in them so that the only people drug through the street by their heels will be someone from Pakistan.  How about we publicly identify members of your intelligence service that have provided support to our enemies since 9/11/2001 and we'll put a nice price on their head.  How's that sound, sparky?

I'm sure that we can come to some sort of mutually agreeable deal with the 'Stans to the north of Afghanistan, and if we chip in enough information and money, Russia would be more than happy to work with us on transhipment of cargo.  I'm sure that if we gave them information on all of the Chechens and other douchebags, they'll let us push trains of supplies right across the Rodina.  Honestly, I'll pay a premium to do it just so that we can quit messing with your little paradise.

Good luck, guys.  Hope to see you on the History Channel soon as a "What Happens When You Try To Play Both Sides Of The Fence" show. 

1 comment:

Stephen said...

Solution, turn the whole damn place into a soft green glow...

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