Things I don't want to think about

This list includes a lot of things, and geriatric sexual revolution is one of them.

Apparently, a retirement community is having a boom in VD due to a boom in old people dancing the horizontal mambo.

I love my grandparents, and I would want them to enjoy their retirement. But I draw the line at imagining Nana and Papa running around like a couple of college students on the make.

Not that old people shouldn't get busy. Hey, they lived that long, let them do whatever. My father was the youngest of 12, and his father was 65 when he was born. Family tradition. I hope when I get to that age, I'll still be chasing skirts.

But somebody get these people some condoms. Heck, they're the World War II generation. Show them those Army VD movies they made in the 1940's that my drill sergeant forced me to watch in 1989. If that doesn't scare them off the stuff entirely, it'll at least convince them to wrap their rascals.