Thursday, October 21, 2010

Relationship thoughts

  1. A difference of opinion does not constitute an expression of hostility.
  2. Just because I don't care for the Irish vegetable soup that is made with the recipe your Great-Grandmother smuggled out of the old country in her nether regions does not mean I don't love you.
  3. No, seriously, it doesn't.
  4. If you want it done exactly the way you would have done it, then please feel free to do it yourself.
  5. When you tell the 12 year old that she's done enough for one night while she's putting out the yard waste, you forfeit the right to get snarky with me because the yard waste didn't get put out on time.
  6. My love for you is totally separated from the rest of your family.  It is not an attack on you when I start drinking prior to our visits with them because "I'm not doing this sober".
  7. I'm a big boy.  I can dress myself.  It is neither necessary or desired for you to buy me clothes because I "can't seem to wear anything that's not earth tones".
  8. Getting up 5 minutes before the alarm goes off is not being 'pro-active', it's psychotic.
  9. I'm not crazy, I've just been in a bad mood since 1977.
  10. Yes, it's fall.  Yes, that means football and hunting.  No, I will not be around to help you pick out lace curtain patterns for the house we don't even own.   Look at it this way, you can decorate our existing house any way you want until February.
  11. No, I do not have enough guns.  Do you have enough camera lenses, filters, and tripods?
  12. Why is it that when we were dating I was "youthful" and now I'm just "immature"?
  13. No, it is not cute when the two year old head butts me in the junk.
  14. No, he is not going to die a horrible death because he has a runny nose.
  15. No, waking up from a bad dream does not constitute grounds for an emergency room visit for said toddler.
  16. You make me 'lizard happy'.

6 comments:

ZerCool said...

I'm a big boy. I can dress myself. It is neither necessary or desired for you to buy me clothes because I "can't seem to wear anything that's not earth tones".

I'm glad to know I'm not the only one. I am comfortable in blues, greens, tans, browns, and maybe some red.

If I wanted to dress like a macaw, I would. I prefer the more subtle approach.

Shannon said...

Oh, how I love this...although, it seems to me that it wouldn't come out so eloquently when done verbally, would it?

DaddyBear said...

No, these don't come out quite so lovingly and funny when said in the heat of the moment. That's why I always attach an "I love you" to them when we're talking.

DaddyBear said...

Z, the comment Irish Woman makes about my wardrobe is that I can only see in 16bit color. There is black, gray, white, tan, dark tan, brown, light green, green, dark green, light blue, dark blue, red, yellow, pink, and purple. And I don't wear jewel tones if I can help it.

Julie said...

pink? pink? what do you have in pink? and why??????

DaddyBear said...

Julie, I don't own anything pink, unless you count a couple of undershirts that got washed with red underwear or something. Those are just the colors that I can see according to her.

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